oh wow im glad i didnt delete this blog, its infamous now
who is this
this is all a random inside joke because the person i wrote it for liked syrup and Richard Ramirez the serial killer and hes called the night stalker so…yeah
“heyyey e h sbwsaaaaaaAG”
Julian said, meaning “i’m just tryna find a mountain I can climb” or something like that, but you can never tell because no one can tell what Julian Casablancas is saying. Especially when he was drunk, like he is right now. He needed Nick Valensi to be his translator because Nick Valensi is hot.
“wwearn ajcks mmeeeeeeee”” Julian Screamed at a canadian girl across the street.who was wearing her favorite moose meat jacket. It was Neve. Nick shook his head, but sighed when he saw that Neve knew who they were. She wheezed and ran across the street almost getting run over by a moose.
“mooooooooooooo gglg gsasrthaaaaaaaaaaa” julian splurged and then puked up Nikolai who he had eaten earlier with his sushi.
Nikolai was dead because he was inside of Julian Casablancas for too long and thats never a good place to be, even Julian would agree.weeeeeeee Julian wrote a song out of that later on that night. But first he clumsily ripped off Neve’s clothes. By this point Nick had walked off to go have syrup free sex with Kelli. So everything Julian said was just a drowsy sounding noise like a black man on drugs.
“kissme nonw and wannnaaaa toan rontoollll youuuuuuuuuu weee o aforeeees suck me apenis i borring” Is all Neve heard before Julians 12centimeter possibly mexican cock was shoved into her little mouth.
Hhehe i amean AHHH… no i didntman dat at al ooo00oohhhhhhhhhh” he started humping at her face until he passed out.
There was syrup drool coming out of the side of his face. Neve licked it off, looking around to make sure no one was watching her. Then she touched his penis, and he died of a stroke how ironic
“TOOOKK A A SSHIIIT IT WAS FINNNNEE” were his last words.
Neve was at the Roger Daltrey concert when ALL OF THE SUDDEN a wild Pete Townshend appears. But almost no one noticed because he was just a nose on a stick. But Neve thought Pete was a foxy nose on a stick so she noticed his foxy ass right away. Pete whipped out a ukulele and started playing it like a faggot, then he smashed it over Roger’s head and started stripping. As he removed his clothes he threw them onto Roger’s unconscious face. He took off his shirt first revealing his silky smooth chest that was like pancakes, then he took off his pants and showed everyone his pancakey legs. Neve was looking at Petes hot body and making dolphin noises and drooling on her camera. ”WOWZA” Neve exclaimed when Pete finally got to taking off his underwear. Just like his face, his crotch was unshaven. Neve enjoyed his hairyness so much she ran up onto the stage and touched him. Pete saw Neve and said “Oi, I know you! You’re the syrup bird!” and pulled out a nice hot bottle of syrup from his pubic hair then he said “i’m gunna rape you.”
But it wasn’t really rape because it was consensual and Neve liked it. But she was also underage so it kind of was. Anyways Pete whipped his head around like he was in Charlies Angels as he poured warm syrup all over himself. Then he looked Neve straight in the eye and got down on his knees. He carefully pulled her pants off with his sticky syrupy hands, then her beluga skin underwear. “i’m good at making breakfast” Pete smiled, Then he plunged his syrup-covered nose into her vagina. He rubbed it around and caressed every part of her like a dolphin. The Beluga noises Pete was doing was making Neve hot and moist. Syrup started sliding down her leg and Pete licked it from the bottom all the way back up to her vagina. Then Pete flew off in a funky UFO from outer space PEWAWWWW
You are staring the Golden God in the eye. Your mind can’t seem to process his absolute perfection and remember how to breathe at the same time. So you close your eyes for a second and take a deep breath. But it was completely in vain because when you opened your eyes again he was smiling. Robert Plant was smiling at you. The events that led up to this weren’t really important, and quite frankly you couldn’t hardly remember them at the moment. For all you knew you were dreaming.
Your eyes wandered, appreciating his post-show sweatiness, his bare chest, his perfect curls, and the massive bulge in his pants. You looked but you didn’t dare touch him. There was a muddle all around you. There were more girls and band members and other miscellaneous people. But they were all background noise. They only thing you could really hear was the erratic pounding of your heart.
Robert had picked you out and now here you were staring at each other in silence. The others were drinking and laughing, some of them making out even. You let out a little disappointed sigh, wishing your friend was with you. But she had run off with Jimmy. You always had more confidence around your friends. But you were alone, with the Golden God.
Apparently Robert heard your sigh because you felt him gently drag his finger along the exposed skin on your thigh, raising tiny goose bumps on your leg and causing you to let out a gasp. You bit your lip self-consciously and diverted you gaze. Past the pounding of your heart and the chaos around you, you hear Robert say “What’s your name, love?”
You knew you were blushing like mad, and he was smiling at you. God, it was driving you crazy. He said “come here.” and patted his thigh. You obeyed like a frightened puppy. Though you knew there was nothing to be frightened of. He seemed gentle enough and very humble.
You got up daintily from the couch you were sitting on a sat down on his knee, trying awkwardly not to set your whole weight on him. He pressed his hand on your back to keep you steady and started rubbing It in a circle. Your skirt was extra short, so your canadian ass cheeks were touching his pants while the back part of your skirt draped off. Thankfully you had worn your moose skin underwear.
You put your hands in your lap and looked up and Robert. He put a lock of your long hair behind your ear then rested his hand on your knee. Jimmy walked into the room then and walked over to Robert. He mumbled something in his ear which you didn’t hear, but they nodded and such at each other. Then Robert looked at you and asked “want to see the Starship?” and of course you nodded in agreement. But you didn’t feel special about it or anything. You couldn’t have been the only girl invited.
Robert patted your back, and you got off of his knee and he grabbed your hand. You left the room with him and Jimmy, the rest of the room not seeming to notice at all the coming and going of the two rock stars. You were led through many dark hallways and such until you met up with the other two band members. You wondered where your friend had gone and if she was on the Starship as well, considering she wasn’t with Jimmy. The Starship was huge and grandiose. Just looking at it got you excited and wondering what was inside. After they all chatted for a bit Robert said “c’mon, love.” you walked hand-in-hand with him towards the huge plane with the rest of Led Zeppelin. The feeling was so surreal and the closest you’ve ever felt to actually being someone.
After you walked up the steps and walked inside you were just in awe. There were so many people, and so many things. Robert walked you both straight to the bar and ordered 2 beers for you both. Not bothering to ask if you were old enough. As soon as you had it in your hands and took a sip, you started to feel a bit more comfortable. A few of the other girls on the ship were looking at you with an envious look on their face. It made you get a bit of an ego, even though you full well knew you weren’t much of anything special to Robert. Though, there had to have been something special about you for him to pick you out of the group of girls waiting just to catch a glimpse of his godliness.
You smiled at him confidently now, as he looked at you sweetly. When your brain really started to process the current situation though, you started to panic. People didn’t get picked out and brought onto the Starship just for a drink and a nice chat. You knew at least that much. You also knew that you were only 13, though you didn’t necessarily look it. Not to mention a virgin. Not that it bothered you, it just made you feel insanely inferior to everyone around who was without a doubt deflowered long ago. Maybe you should’ve gotten with Jimmy…he seemed to like the younger ones anyways.
You stopped your internal moping at the sight of Roberts compassionate blue-eyed stare. To avoid any questions you struck up a conversation. “So… Robert.” it felt nice to say his name out loud. You quickly realised that small talk was far from what you came here for, and changed what you were going to say. “Do I get a tour of the Starship?” you said as seductively as possible, knowing full well that there had to be a bedroom of some sort on this godforsaken monster.
“oh, why yes, of course.” he seemed more than welcome, and you both got up. He put his arm around your shoulder and led you through the thick hoards of groupies and whoever else, all the way to the far back of the jet. He let go of you and opened the door and made a gesture for you to walk in.
Here it was. The bedroom. It consisted just of a great big bed with black sheets and pillows and a nightstand.
“This,” Robert said from behind you “is the glorious bedroom.”
A big smile spread across your face and you walked over and perched yourself on the edge of the bed. You looked at Robert with a very hungry look on your face. He returned it and shut the door behind him.
He walked toward you, the image of perfection. The Golden God. Everything about him just screamed “fuck me”. You got up from the bed and placed your hand on his chest and leaned up to kiss him. His lips sucked you in and melted with yours. You were tugging gently on the hair of his chest, and your tongue was begging to enter his mouth. He was a lot calmer and slowly opened his mouth to you, while he placed his hand on your hip. His hand softly caressed your form and then started to explore under your shirt. You were gasping for breath and the kiss was getting sloppy.
Even though you were slightly shorter than him you managed to maneuver him onto the bed. He was glowing, and you were dying of absolute anticipation. He sat up, his hair in a mess, and watched you as you dressed down into your underwear. Then the rest was left to instinct. You got on your knees and undid his belt buckle and unzipped his pants forcefully. He let out a little moan as his package poured out into sight. You wanted to scream with excitement, but you continued striping his pants off.
You reached your hand up to stroke him, and it was almost shaking. Robert’s eyes were closed and his head was titled back a bit. You took a moment to just look at him in all of his perfection before you touched him. Once you did you could here his breath almost turning into a moan. And fucking Christ his dick was huge. Not that you had anything to compare it to, honestly. Eventually you decided it was time and you slowly lifted your mouth up to him and filled your mouth with it. The moan that escaped Robert was beautiful and high-pitched. It gave you confidence even in your inexperience.oops the end ahahah ok thats a shit end i should do something about that
alright so neve was bored and she sent richard ramirez a letter and she sent him a picture and everything, He never replied back or anything. but she was sitting in her room and she looked out the window cause she was sad and guess who was there. the night stalker himself. he opened her window and climbed in. he raped her silly with a bottle of syrup while uttering satanic stuff cause he likes satan. then he hit her over the head with a base ball ball til she bled syrup. the end.
why did you tag it
laughed and woke everyone up